Saturday, February 11, 2012

Adjournment- Beginnings are scary and goodbyes are sad

The hardest group to leave for me was the Bible study group I was involved in during my first teaching assignment.  This group consisted of a group of teachers whom I worked with.  We would meet each week for our study.  We had to have strong trust as we shared deep personal issues.  We all knew that we could count on each other no matter what the issue was.  When the adoption my husband and I were waiting on did not go through they were there to support me through it.  When I was getting ready to move to Arizona we had the final meeting that I would be able to attend.  I was teaching the study and was finishing up the book we were reading.  Instead I found we were having a farewell party.  I received a quilt with patches from the teachers at the school I worked at.  This was a tradition for retiring teachers which I was not.  I still have my quilt and pull it out from time to time when I need strength or guidance.  I look at the individual squares and think “what would she do?”  I love my quilt as I love all the ladies in that group.

What made this group so tough to leave was the friendships I built, the trust I had in them, and the growth that we had all made personally and professionally.  I would consider this a high-performing group.  We would set goals for ourselves and work with each other to meet them.  We had clearly established norms that we all maintained.  High performing groups are hard to leave because of all the accomplishments and contacts that you make.  These contacts you can use for future projects.

I am guessing that the adjourning phase of our group will be one that cannot be avoided.  Our departure will be full of well wishes on our blogs and we will silently go on our new journey.  We have shared our struggles and ideas with each other.  Though we have never met face to face we have an idea of what each other is like.  We all have a story to tell and a path to guide.  So I will say farewell, good luck, and strength be with you all.  We have made our own quilt here through our blog; we can pull up our blog and ask “what would she do?” 

3 comments:

  1. I know it was very hard for you to leave such a strong group of people. Like every good thing, it has to come to end. I have enjoyed reading your insightful blog posts. I love your bitter sweet ending quote. I will always remember what you said.

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  2. Leslie,
    I volunteered on a Board of Directors for a couple of years. At the end I received a present which I will always have to remind me of the time I spent getting to know this particular group of people. I love your thinking about our blogs --piecing them together to make a quilt--and the question-"What would she do?" Lovely!
    Tamara

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  3. Hello Leslie, I too found my church group hardest to end. I think it was because they were a part of my personal life and together we went through many of life’s ups and downs. What surprised me most was I only knew these women for a short time. But I did not see us as a high-performing group as you saw yours. I can only hope we are fortunate enough to finds such friendship again.

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Personal Childhood Web

Mom-My mother
Influence: showed me a love of learning that has lasted a life time. She would have “Tea Parties” with me but insisted on real food not pretend. She would read to us each night and tuck us in. She showed her love and affection by being there and showing me how to make it on my own. Her impact on my life is ongoing. She is still guiding me to be a better and stronger person.

Dad: My birth father
Influence: taught me that continuing your education may be tough but is always worth the effort. He would take me on camping trips each summer and road trips to historical places. He always called me “sis”. His influence takes me to historical sites. I have an appetite for history.

Don: My step-dad (Dad)
Influence: taught me that hard work was important in life. He taught me how to drive my first stick shift. He moved me back and forth to college many times without question. He considered me his own and became my father when mine abandoned me. He still checks in on me and makes sure my head is on straight.

Grandma D: Paternal Grandmother
Influence: she taught me how to be a “proper” young lady. I remember how I should behave to this day. She showed me how to make ordinary everyday things into magical paths to the imaginary world. A refrigerator box could be a house, doctor’s office, fort, or a cave below hundreds of feet. She showed me how to cook and sew so I could be a good wife. Though she is not with me now I still can look at a plain item and imagine where it could lead me.

Grandma Z: Maternal Grandmother
Influence: taught me that women could be fierce and independent. She loved flowers and taught me a love of them as well.