Saturday, June 9, 2012

The kids are learning WHAT?


My initial reaction to the book excerpt So sexy so soon, was amazement (Levin, D. E., & Kilbourne, J., 2009).  The thought that children at such a young age are being hit with these ideas and are able to process them was horrible.   Once I was able to close up my jaw from the shock I was able to process the ideas more clearly.  I started to analyze things I saw on TV and toys that are in the store and even my own child’s behavior.   I can see the ideas that they shared happening all around me.

One experience that I had recently was in talking with another professional colleague who worked with college level adults.  She was asking me my take on a conversation she had with a friend.  The friend has a preschool daughter (3-4 years old).  The mother got a phone call from the school about and incident that happened at during the day.  The girl leaned over the table during activity time and kissed a boy.  She had her tongue in his mouth and was holding on to him so he would not get away.  The mother did not understand why everyone was so upset.  She was asking “is this not normal?-they’re just kids”.   When I first heard this story I though “what is she learning at home?”   After reading this book excerpt I had to rethink.   It may not be what she is learning from her parents but the media she is watching.

This spring at our school play day the children were allowed to wear their swimsuits.  The children were third and fourth graders, who know what they are looking at.  I must be old fashion but the swimsuits the girls were wearing were a little lacking in the material department.  The girl’s new fashions were bikini tops and boy shorts.  I thought I was at a skin farm.  These bikinis’ showed way to much skin for 8 year old girls.  The girls were discussing with each other how “hot” their suit looked on them. 

These messages will impact young children in a negative manner.  The girls will think that they should wear clothes that are reveling and make them look “hot” in order to fit in with their peers.  If they do not have the “right” clothes they may be ostracized by the larger group.  This will deepen the message and cause them to go down a bad path-one of trying to be accepted.  Boys will be given the message that this is how girls are supposed to look and act.  So the message they will get about gender is that boys were just shorts and girls wear skimpy tops and boy bottoms. 

As teachers we have to stop looking the other way when issues come up.  We have to confront them even though it may be difficult and uncomfortable.  As early an early childhood professional I could promote books and pictures of children who are having fun in a nonsexual manner.  I could also use pictures and books with more sexualized images to discuss how it could hurt the image the child has of themselves.  We will also look at boys and girls who are outside of the normal stereotype and talk about it they are boys or girls and why they think that.  Also it is important to have the discussion that they are each different and that they don’t have to follow the rigid stereotypical roles. 

Resources
Levin, D. E., & Kilbourne, J. (2009). [Introduction]. So sexy so soon: The new sexualized childhood and what parents can do to protect their kids (pp. 1-8). New York: Ballantine Books. Retrieved from:http://dianeelevin.com/sosexysosoon/introduction.pdf

3 comments:

  1. I agree with you about the swimsuits. As a mother and a teacher I encouraged my parents to buy one piece suits for the girls it was easy when the younger girls saw my oldest daughter wear one then it was acceptable; in fact for some of the girls I care for she is just as much of a role model as their mom and I are.

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  2. Children are so stereotyped today. You must look a certain, dress a certain way, and act a certain way. I teach my daughter to be happy with who you are. You don't have to be skinny to be considered beautiful. It is so important in my future work with children is to constantly let them know that they are valued and important.

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  3. Hi listening to your story my mouth would have been wide open to because children are being explorted on tv, in the media, even in magazines. children are forced to grow up fast instead of enjoying their childhood and just being a kid. Being a parent is very hard because you are not given instrutions on how to be a parent you just go for what you know and what you learn from your parents and family around you. As an educator it's our job to be a mentor, a teacher, and even a parent to children who do not have that foundation that we once had and guide them that they are important regardless what society, and the media say.

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Personal Childhood Web

Mom-My mother
Influence: showed me a love of learning that has lasted a life time. She would have “Tea Parties” with me but insisted on real food not pretend. She would read to us each night and tuck us in. She showed her love and affection by being there and showing me how to make it on my own. Her impact on my life is ongoing. She is still guiding me to be a better and stronger person.

Dad: My birth father
Influence: taught me that continuing your education may be tough but is always worth the effort. He would take me on camping trips each summer and road trips to historical places. He always called me “sis”. His influence takes me to historical sites. I have an appetite for history.

Don: My step-dad (Dad)
Influence: taught me that hard work was important in life. He taught me how to drive my first stick shift. He moved me back and forth to college many times without question. He considered me his own and became my father when mine abandoned me. He still checks in on me and makes sure my head is on straight.

Grandma D: Paternal Grandmother
Influence: she taught me how to be a “proper” young lady. I remember how I should behave to this day. She showed me how to make ordinary everyday things into magical paths to the imaginary world. A refrigerator box could be a house, doctor’s office, fort, or a cave below hundreds of feet. She showed me how to cook and sew so I could be a good wife. Though she is not with me now I still can look at a plain item and imagine where it could lead me.

Grandma Z: Maternal Grandmother
Influence: taught me that women could be fierce and independent. She loved flowers and taught me a love of them as well.