A day at the splash pad
The situation that I observed was a father and his two daughters
at the community splash pad. There are many jets that shoot water into the air and the children
can run through them and get wet. The
first girl was around 7 or 8 and the younger girl was about 2. I was there with my son and water loving puppy enjoying
the cool water on a day that was quickly warming up.
What I noticed and observed
The father was interacting with the girls and encouraging them to
explore the fountains of water shooting up from the ground. He would occasionally lower himself to where
he was closer to eye level with his younger daughter. He was very encouraging and would clap when
she squealed at getting wet. The older girl was not as excited about getting in
the water and kept asking if it was ok that she got wet. The father kept encouraging her to get wet
but did not look at her when he did. He
was focused on watching the younger girl. He would occasionally gather handfuls of water
and chase her with them.
Was it effective?
The effective communication strategies that I noticed were that
the father was including the girls in the conversations. He would talk to them and wait for their
responses. He would lower his body to
where it was more at their level. He was
a taller gentleman so it was more noticeable.
He also did not intrude on what they were trying to do but was waiting
for them to include him into their play.
The older girl was more willing to accept his participation. The younger girl was more interested in
taking the risk of joining other child’s play but would occasionally come back
to check on Dad.
What may have helped?
What may have been more effective when talking to the older girl,
would have been for the father to look at her when he was encouraging her to
get into the water. He could have asked
her why she was more timid about getting into the fun of the water. She may have needed that act of concern. As a parent I realize it is harder when you
have a toddler you are trying to keep track of as well. When he was praising the younger girl at her
braveness for exploring the water he could use more specific feedback. He could say something such as, “great job on
getting your feet in the water” or “you are brave for running through the
fountain”. Then follow up with
questions such as “how does the water feel on your feet?” or “where does the
water come from?” These types of
questions will help them to think more deeply and may start a new conversation
and investigation.
What they may have felt
The younger girl may have felt empowered by her father’s praises
and she was more willing to try new experiences. She was willing to take larger risks because
of the encouragement and support she received. The older girl may not have felt
as supported and that was why she was more timid at joining in on the fun.
My insights
In watching the interactions
with the father and his two girls it made me think about my own conversations
with my son and young children I work with.
I am going to try and use more open ended questions and questions that
may spark a whole new investigation. I
don’t feel that I listen as well as I should to children and need to pay more
attention to what they are trying to tell me.
I need to slow down and take a step back and spend time just listening
to what is going on around me.
